Soul Food
Soul Food
Broken Beyond Repair (Part 10)
Struggling with an internal battle that seems impossible to overcome? Leticia's story of fighting depression and self-medication might resonate with you, offering hope and insight. Her journey shared on the Soul Food Podcast, reveals the hidden struggles behind a seemingly functional exterior. We shine a light on how negative words, particularly from those we love, can scar deeply, creating a cycle of pain and isolation. Through Leticia's experience, we underscore the importance of finding a supportive community like the Universal Church, which served as her spiritual rehab, rebuilding her life through faith and a relationship with God.
Join us as we unpack the universal impact of depression and verbal abuse, illustrated by personal tales of overcoming worthlessness and self-hatred rooted in harsh family dynamics. We explore how faith and spiritual guidance offered a lifeline, transforming lives in ways that seemed impossible. Hear stories of resilience, like those of Leticia and others, who found restoration through the power of God. This episode is a heartfelt reminder that no one is beyond repair and that healing is possible with the right support and spiritual direction. Reach out, embrace the challenge, and witness the power of God in your life!
It's time for Soul Food Podcast.
Speaker 2:Broken Beyond Repair. The untold stories of those who were once broken.
Speaker 3:You feel broken beyond repair. Actually, nobody believes in you. They say that there is no way to repair your life, that you never change, and these words, uh, breaks you even more. You know, bishop david, the person's already broken, like these ladies here were broken. Yes, a person's already broken and when they hear such statements breaks a person even more.
Speaker 4:It's like you're taking the little pieces that are broken and you break it even more they lose all hope, every any hope to change, when other people don't believe in you, when other people think that you are a hopeless case when your parents, your own family, your friends, especially in this world, comes from the parents, because parents have the authority either to bless or to curse.
Speaker 3:When you say to a child, you are good for nothing. You say to a young boy, young daughter, you are going to grow and you never succeed, you are not going to make it. Your words are sharper than a knife that goes there inside.
Speaker 4:And maybe they don't want to believe it, but that word stays there. It's like a poison, right, and it affects them. And it's like a prophecy, isn't it? Yes, it's like a negative prophecy. It comes true?
Speaker 3:Yeah, because when you speak, you are prophesying. Whatever you say is a prophecy. I used to say that the one a person speaking is sowing, and those who hear those words, they are reaping. Yes, so when I speak, I am sowing either good or bad seeds, and when you hear, you are reaping the seed that I am showing right.
Speaker 4:If you accept that word, if you grab a hold of it, you allow it to enter into your soul, then you're going to bring a harvest to that word, good or bad.
Speaker 3:Nobody is broken beyond repair before God, in the presence of God, we used to say the universal church is a school of faith, a hospital of faith. It's a spiritual rehab to rehabilitate you. We have just two ladies here whose life was broken and they were transformed. Who wants to be the first one? I decided that you are going to be the first one. What's your name? Again, it's Leticia Leticia.
Speaker 5:Yes.
Speaker 3:Leticia, when you came to us, how broken were you.
Speaker 5:I was really broken Bishop. I was suffering with depression. It led me to indulge in alcohol, cigarettes, marijuana, even cocaine for a couple of years. I was just sad inside. So I was trying to find anything to help me, to ease that sadness, to bring comfort to me, but it never did. For a minute I was happy. Then, after the alcohol and everything, the effects went away. I was back sad again.
Speaker 3:Leticia. What is depression all about? Because many viewers have depression, but they do not know what depression is all about.
Speaker 5:Well for me. When I was suffering with depression, I was sad. I was constantly sad inside and it feel like my life was going nowhere. I was empty and I was just hurting like this hurting inside.
Speaker 3:I didn't feel anything so you did not feel anything, yeah, as you had this depression, sadness inside of you. Some people just stay in a dark room. Yeah, they don't want to leave, they don't want to socialize. What about you?
Speaker 5:I would go out. But you know, sometimes I would try to go out and just walk around outside. Sometimes I didn't spend as much time with my children like I was supposed to. I was neglecting my kids because I was always just wanting to be alone, be by myself. I didn't want to do anything much.
Speaker 3:You gave up. You just gave up in life, you gave up on life.
Speaker 5:Yes, I did, bishop. I gave up on life. So I just said you know what Gave up?
Speaker 3:on life. Yes, I did, Bishop, I gave up on life. So I just said you know what? Okay, we see this video now. This person in the dark room Was that you before Like?
Speaker 5:in a dark room? Desperate, I wasn't in a dark room, I was just around, just sitting around in my house and just watching TV constantly and just trying to find some kind of peace, something to fill the sadness.
Speaker 4:Were you able to work.
Speaker 5:I was able to work. I worked for a little bit, but then I wasn't doing what I was supposed to.
Speaker 4:Did you feel like you had to put on a mask for?
Speaker 5:everyone else yes, I did so you were pretending, I was pretending yes.
Speaker 4:Inside you felt awful, yes, but then on the outside.
Speaker 5:I was trying to, but you would smile. I would smile on the outside Just for other people.
Speaker 4:Yeah yeah, and how did that make you feel it's like you were being fake?
Speaker 5:Yeah, it did. It made me feel like I was being fake.
Speaker 3:How did it affect? Like family finances, because when a person is in this situation, he loses the taste of life, Bishop.
Speaker 4:a person can't be creative. You can't do a good job of what you're doing when you're depressed, you cannot produce anything Right.
Speaker 3:How did it affect you?
Speaker 5:I lost many jobs, bishop. It was a lot of jobs I lost because I wouldn't want to get up to go to work. Some days I would go and I would call in a lot. I just didn't want to go to work. So it would affect that my children. They would ask me to come out and play with them and I didn't want to do it. I didn't want to play. I just didn't want to do anything.
Speaker 3:You lost jobs and the relationship with the family.
Speaker 5:Yes.
Speaker 3:Were not good.
Speaker 5:Yes.
Speaker 3:Okay, let me ask you something Did you ever think of suicide?
Speaker 5:No, I never had suicidal thoughts, never, never had suicidal thoughts.
Speaker 3:Right Now I feel good back talking to you, but what's your name? Again, my name is Irinia, Irinia. Tell us how broke were you, Irinia, when you came to us?
Speaker 6:Well, before I had depression and it started at a very early age. I was about 10 years old and I already had depression because I had a lot of problems with my family, with my parents, and especially because my mom, she also had depression, so she neglected me a lot. And then she used to like speak a lot like verbal abuse and like tell me like that I wasn't worth it. And as I tried growing up you know, going to school like I was trying to give my best, but every time, like I would do something wrong, she was like, oh, you're not worth it, you're not worth anything.
Speaker 6:So that caused me to have a lot of insecurities, like within myself, within, within how I thought about myself. So I used to think I was ugly, I used to see them and look at myself in the mirror and I used to hate myself. And that caused me to have hatred towards my mom as well. I hated her so much like I, like I. Every time she would try to talk to me like I, I would just have like this hateful look at her and but then again she wouldn't also talk to me because she would also, like you know, lock herself in her room because she was depressed and then, which caused me to close myself as well. So, like I, I was that type of person that would like lock myself in my room and in the dark and I would cry myself to sleep to be inside of the dark room.
Speaker 3:Yes, sir, okay doing what?
Speaker 6:uh, most of the time I would just cry. I was crying. I was crying because I was so sad, like I. I was a like I would try to get comfort from my mom, but like she couldn't give me that comfort because she was also sad.
Speaker 3:The pressure led you to be in the dark room hating your mother because she also had depression. Yes, sir, I was saying a few minutes ago that the words from the parents is sharper than a knife that pierces the soul. So you were saying that she used to say bad remarks about you.
Speaker 6:Yes, sir, yeah, because my mother, she's like a very intelligent woman, but the depression she had caused her to drop out of school because she was so depressed and whenever I got like older and older, like I tried to do good in school, I would get like B's or A's and she was like, no, that's not good enough, no, you have to do more. I used to do way better than I, would get like B's or A's and she was like, no, that's not good enough, no, you have to do more. Oh, if I used to do way better than you, than when I was in school, like, oh, why are you so stupid? Why did I have you like she? She would tell me things like that to bring me down a lot and you were 10 years old yes, sir, I started at the age of 10.
Speaker 3:10 yes sir, we see here that depression, depression does not spare anybody. Because her mother was highly educated, a very intelligent person, but depression changed her mindset, her behavior, and the girl was only 10 years old suffering from depression. So, whether you are black, white, you have highly educated, you are highly educated or you have no education. Whether you are rich or poor, young or old, depression is the disease of the soul.
Speaker 4:That's right. It affects everyone, and every place in the world that we have traveled, we find depressed people Right. There's no country, no continent that doesn't have depressed people, and it seems like today that people are getting depressed younger and younger, and I think the Internet and social media even encourages this kind of thing. So did your mother was lashing out at you. Did you start lashing out at other people? Did you start criticizing other people or become an angry person?
Speaker 6:Well, I would lash out at her, mostly because at first I was very closed and like I wouldn't tell her anything because I was scared of her as well. But then as I got older, to like around the age of 14, I started lashing out at her. And also at an early age I was diagnosed with ADD, so I had to start taking medication which was Adderall.
Speaker 4:So explain to people what ADD is.
Speaker 6:So ADD is when a person has difficulty paying attention Like they're in class. I had to take it when I was in school. They were in class and they couldn't focus. Like they, the teacher would be talking and but then, like they would see, like a fly walk by or fly by and then they would just get distracted by that and I had that trouble focusing and because of that, like that caused me to not have good grades and that's why my mother would get mad at me because of that, um, but because I had to start taking adderall, it caused me to be very angry, even more angry than I was. So I was like very, and I fell more into depression because I was angry and I wasn't eating. I was. I got very, very skinny, very, very skinny, to the point where, like people ask me like, oh, are you okay? What's wrong?
Speaker 3:but like I lost a lot of weight because of that medication so those words did affect you, brought this bad impact in your life. Yes, sir, well, you are watching us right now and you say I suffer from depression. I am a very depressed person. I don't want to live anymore. I just want to die. You don't need to take your life to solve your problem. God can solve your problem and you can have a better life. Right, you don't need to take your life. You don't need to kill yourself. Take the life that you don't want and bring it to us. We know how to take care of it Through the Spirit of God, the name of Jesus. We know how to take care of it through the spirit of god, the name of jesus. We know how to take care of people like you. And, by the way, I make a challenge with you right now in this broken, beyond repair segment.
Speaker 3:We are in this episode today about depression. We are challenging you who have depression. If you come to us and this depression never change, it never leaves your body, I'm going to bring you here in this show live, just as we brought these people here to share their story. If you do what I'm telling you to do and nothing changed, this couch will be yours. We are going to take you here and you are going to say to everybody that we are liars, that we are false prophets. You can tell whatever you want. However, I challenge call this number right now, text this number and you are going to see the way out that you want. You are inside of the dark room right now. You are in a dark hole. Come to us, take the challenge and you are going to see that this dark place, this place of depression, is not for you.
Speaker 2:Do you feel broken and helpless? Join now the Broken Beyond Repair Challenge and begin to see great changes in your life. Call now at 1-888-332-4141 or text the word challenge to 1-888-312-4141.
Speaker 7:For anyone who is out there struggling, know that you're not alone. There's other people going through what you're going through too.
Speaker 8:Being good to yourself. I think sometimes people don't give themselves permission to honor themselves and be good to themselves.
Speaker 9:What you feel is real and it matters.
Speaker 10:Right now, you might be feeling like there is no way out, and you might be feeling like your only way out is to end it all, but by doing that, you're robbing yourself from the opportunity to find happiness and to realize how beautiful this life really is.
Speaker 8:Give yourself a break, take some time off, even if it's just for a day on the weekend or something.
Speaker 9:Be patient with yourself. We all go through hard times and don't let anyone tell you or discourage you from what you're going through.
Speaker 11:You know, when I went through what I was going through, I had such a difficult time with my parents because they didn't know how to communicate with me about it, and I didn't know how to communicate with them about it. The world is so big now. The internet is there, there are resources. You just have to know what the right questions are to ask and figure out how to find the people that are going through the same things as you.
Speaker 7:Get off the couch. Just like get off the couch. I know it's so easy to sink into it when you're feeling crummy. Force yourself on a walk, Make sure you're moving your body. Whatever that looks like dance, yoga, hiking, football, anything Just move your body.
Speaker 1:Whatever it takes, go get help. We live in a place where you can get help. If it takes five weeks, three weeks a month, just wait patiently. Don't give up. Don't give up on your life, because you will eventually be the person you were before. Trust me on that.
Speaker 5:I just want you to remember that you can create something from the pain that you're feeling. You can help people and, the midst of all of it, just love yourself be patient with yourself.
Speaker 7:These are things that make you wonderful and unique and develop the personality and develop you into the person you are meant to become, and know that you are loved and you're, and you're special and you're wonderful.
Speaker 9:Every day, I'll write down the things that I'm grateful for and when I'm in those dark places, even if I don't believe it, I will just look at that list and say it out loud and remind myself it's going to be okay, and you have so much to live for, be good to yourself, forgive yourself, be kind to yourself.
Speaker 7:You deserve it. It starts with you and I promise, I promise it'll get better.
Speaker 12:Find people who care, and if there is no one who does care, stick up for yourself and advocate for yourself, because you're worth it, things will start to happen, motion will start to happen and it's never, ever, ever going to be cut and dry easy black and white. I'm anxious. I feel better Like it's never going to be that, but at the end of the day it feels so much better to move forward than to stay stuck forward than to stay stuck.
Speaker 3:You are going to see now the story of these two ladies whose lives were transformed. So problems in the house relationship, you had problems at school, and how did you know about the Universal Church?
Speaker 6:I came to the universal church because my mom was actually watching tv and that's how she saw it. She. She found out about it with my grandma and they came and at first I was coming, but it was because I was forced to come. They would force me like, oh no, you have to come. And so I was that type of youth who was like no, I don't want to go to church because that's for old people like I.
Speaker 6:I used to have that mentality about the church, about church in general. But then I started coming with my mom. First she started to change. She started to change like how she was, like she was no longer like that angry, depressed person and at first I thought it was fake. I was like, no, this, this isn't real.
Speaker 6:So, like, every time she would try to be nice to me, like I would try to provoke her more to get her mad. Because I was like no, whenever I would try to get her mad, she would get mad. So let me try to get her mad. But every time I tried to get her mad, like she wouldn't respond, she wouldn't get upset. And I was like no, why isn't she like getting upset? But it's because she started taking the church seriously. She started coming to the church, she started doing her purposes and she was free from depression, free from, like, all of what she was going through. So, because of the change I saw in her, I was like you know what, like, maybe, maybe that change can happen in me, because I felt very empty, like I had, like, this void inside of me that, like I didn't know how to fill.
Speaker 3:So you saw the change in your mother and then you decide to come. Yes, sir, what has God done for you?
Speaker 6:well today, now I'm no longer depressed like I, like I'm filled with the Holy Spirit and like I'm not sad, like I don't have to lock myself in my room anymore and my mom is now like my best friend best. Yes, sir.
Speaker 3:Amen. So no more depression. She's your best friend. Yes, sir, both healed. Yes, sir, amen. And what about you? The same?
Speaker 5:I can say the same that what she said. My son saw the difference in me when I started coming to the universal church. But for him he was angry too. He had a little anger issues. But as soon as he me coming to the church and I started to change, he started to change. He wanted to come more, he wanted to be in the church. He saw the difference in me and so he started coming himself. He even walks to the church himself. When I'm not going, when I'm at work and I have to come late, he'll walk to the church. And he saw the difference in me so he started to change as well. So I'm free from depression. No depression, no addiction, nothing.
Speaker 3:So there is healing for depression.
Speaker 5:Yes, there is, it's possible. It's possible. Come to the Universal Church.
Speaker 3:So your soul that was broken, that was crashed, is now transformed.
Speaker 5:It's transformed, bishop, it's transformed. I'm happy. I even play with my kids. I joke around with them. We're all happy.
Speaker 3:It's good so now they have a mother, yes, yes, joke around with them. We all happy, it's good. So now they have a mother, yes, yes. So we see that there is no broken vessel.
Speaker 4:Before the lord he restored, he made back the pieces you know the the secret that irania and and leticia learned in the church was how to use their faith, how to fight, how to say no, I don't accept this. And to insist on the word of God coming true in their life, because if God made promises, they have to come true, because God's not a liar. And so now you can help other people because you are completely healed and free.
Speaker 6:Yes, how you can help other people, because you are completely healed and free.
Speaker 3:Well, the scripture says the Lord is with you while you are with him. If you are with the Lord, the Lord will be with you. If you seek Him, he will be found by you. But if you forsake Him, if you forsake the Lord, he will also forsake you. The secret here is to seek the Lord. God is with me. How do I know that God is with me? I know that God is with me because I am with him. While I am with him, he is with me. The Lord is with you while you are with him.
Speaker 3:Let me show to you this Bible verse once again the same God who blessed the life of these two ladies, he is going to bless yours as well. Well, that was one more broken beyond repair. You saw the case of these two ladies and we have proved to you that your life can be restored all over again and repaired by the power of God. The Universal Church is open. Come to one of our churches. You are watching me here on YouTube channel. Call this number, text this number, take the challenge and you are going to be restored by the power of God. That was one more Broken Beyond Repair.
Speaker 2:Broken, beyond Repair.
Speaker 1:The untold stories of those who were once broken. Thank you for listening to soul food Outro Music.