Soul Food
Soul Food
Broken Beyond Repair (Part 9)
What happens when life feels overwhelming and despair blocks every avenue? This episode of the Soul Food Podcast invites you to discover the transformative journey of Ashley and Adam, a couple once entangled in depression and unstable relationships who found a renewed purpose through faith. Special guest Bishop David joins us, offering insightful perspectives on seeking change when circumstances seem insurmountable. Their story isn't just about overcoming personal problrms; it's an inspiring testament to the relentless power of spiritual awakening.
Our exploration doesn't stop there. We delve into the joy found in returning to one's roots and embracing faith as an anchor for personal growth. Through stories of faith, family, and forgiveness, we discuss the profound impact of these elements in rebuilding lives once thought beyond repair. Highlighting the boundless forgiveness and support available, we extend an invitation to listeners feeling disconnected or overwhelmed, reassuring them that no matter the depths of their struggles, happiness, and renewal are within reach through the power of God.
It's time for Soul Food Podcast Broken. Beyond Repair, the untold stories of those who were once broken.
Speaker 2:If this is how you feel broken beyond repair we have a solution for you, and you know. Bishop David, thank you for joining us. We have this couple here. They were indeed broken beyond repair.
Speaker 3:You know, a couple years ago, if someone had looked at their life, they would have expected them to get divorced, maybe one of them to commit suicide. They were really in a very difficult situation, and it wasn't just them. Their parents, their parents' marriages were a mess also.
Speaker 2:Right and you are watching us over there and you are saying I feel like there is no more way out. I feel like my life is broken beyond repair. I want right now to challenge you. If you feel like you are broken beyond repair and actually this is what people tell you that you are broken beyond repair this is what people tell you that you are broken beyond repair so you are going to call us, you are going to contact us right now. This is my number 1-888-332-4141. Call this number. We are going to be able to assist you. Or else you can text me. This is my text number 1-888-312-4141. The number you see on your screen right now. That's not for call. This is for text. Send us a call and text right now. You are watching the episode today Broken Beyond Repair. This is the story of Ashley and Adam. God has repaired their lives, but I want you to take the challenge. We are challenging you. Your life shall be transformed. Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord.
Speaker 4:I praise in the valley, praise on the mountain.
Speaker 2:I praise when I'm short, praise when I'm down.
Speaker 1:I praise when I'm numbered Praise when surrounded Cause. Praise is the water my enemies found.
Speaker 2:As long as I'm breathing, I've got a reason to praise the Lord oh, my soul Praise the Lord, oh my soul, I praise when I'm feeling sad and I praise when I don't. I praise cause I know You're still in control, cause my praise is a weapon. It's more than a sound. More than a sound, oh, my praise is the shout that breaks Jericho down. As long as I'm breathing, I've got a reason to pray. Praise the Lord, oh my soul.
Speaker 1:Praise the Lord. Oh my soul, oh my soul. Let everything, let us pray. Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Let everything, let everything Come on, come on. Praise the Lord. Let every sin Let us pray. Praise the Lord, praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Do you feel broken and helpless? Join now the Broken Beyond Repair Challenge and begin to see great changes in your life. Call now at 1-888-332-4141 or text the word CHALLENGE to 1-888-312-4141.
Speaker 2:You are going to call this number or send the text. There was a man. He was blind from birth. He was born. He never saw the light of the day. He was born like in darkness and he grew up in darkness, Never saw even a single ray of light. However, jesus appeared to him. He was known as a blind man. You have been called after your problem. If you are an addict, you have this addiction. People call you by names Unemployed, single mother, divorced. They call you many names. Right, that man was called the blind man. Jesus used saliva. The man was healed and one day somebody came to him and said this man that healed you was a sinner. You know that he's a sinner. Let us check a look at his answer, the way that he answered. He said whether he is a sinner or not, I do not know, but one thing I know that I was blind and now I see. It's like he said I was broken and now I am restored. Everybody said, even my family, I will never be able to see, to have the normal eyesight.
Speaker 3:But one thing I know I was blind, I was broken. Now I can see. You know they were attacking Jesus, but the blind man said all I know is that he changed my life. All I know that he did the impossible for me. What no one could do, what I never thought could happen. The Lord Jesus Christ did for me. And so that's the point. That's why we have Ashley and Adam here on the program, because we want you to to look at their story and to to understand that if you're in the same situation, you can be healed too.
Speaker 2:Yes, adam, let me start with you. So you once were broken. Yes, the man was blind. He was healed. What about you? How broken were you before? Uh?
Speaker 4:I was pretty bad. You know, as a man it's hard to admit. You know I was depressed, I was, you know, heartbroken. I could never have a stable relationship. I always got cheated on. You know things are always happening like at jobs, like I was always walked on. You know things are always happening Like at jobs, like I was always walked on, or, you know, you know put under the bus or you know things like that. And you know it was pretty bad. I attempted to commit suicide before. You know I have the marks to prove it. There are times where I jumped out of a moving vehicle, wasted, drunk. You know is I've had accidents at work happen where you know my teeth get knocked out. You know is I've had accidents at work happen where you know my teeth get knocked out. You know something like that and it's just like like a lost cause. You know, like man, like what's going on with this dude, like what's going on with him that, like what did he do?
Speaker 3:You know like as, as you were a teen a teen like in the high school and so forth did people think that you had a future.
Speaker 4:No, people didn't even know I existed, you know. And like I would do witchcraft in school and I would do other things at school, and like I just didn't want to be seen or visible to anybody, like I didn't have any self-worth in myself.
Speaker 2:How and from who you learned how to do witchcraft?
Speaker 4:um, I looked it up on the internet, you know, um, I was really into, like you know, gothic things and stuff and, um, it was pretty bad. You know, I would call it demons from the other side to come and protect me and make me invisible, because it was something I saw in a movie or it was something that I wanted. And I'm like man, like this guy has power. Like I, I don't have power, I don't feel like I have anything, so that's what I would do and ultimately, that's what led to the suicide. It led to the depression, it led to until.
Speaker 2:I got free. What do you mean? Demon from the other side. There is a spell that I remember, that I was calling demons from another realm to me to come and protect me and like, be a part of like around me, and we could see that he was indeed protected. He tried to kill himself. Yeah, he got, he lost his teeth. What a protection he was right.
Speaker 3:He was always losing his job. No one valued him relationship problems yeah, bullying him on his job? Yeah, you know, I mean they he wasn't protected, it was, he was cursed so the evil spirit disguised itself or themselves just to deceive.
Speaker 2:This is what happens when a person goes to the witches or to the cards, to the, the books. They try to get protection or to make money faster easily, but they go into hell itself, because afterwards Satan always sends the bill.
Speaker 3:That's right. The devil promises power or love or, you know, help, protection, but in the end you know the devil can't help anyone. He's not in the business of helping people.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry. Even if he does help, he helps one step and moves a person 10 steps backward. Yeah, because you want to steal a person. He wants to steal a person 10 steps backward. Yeah, because you want to steal a person. He wants to steal a person's trust Once you get involved and then he start doing his work, so like he put a problem in your arm Right, then a person goes to him, to the witch doctors, then the evil spirit hides itself, but then goes to the heart, to the liver. There comes prostate cancer.
Speaker 3:so it looks like the person was healed, yes, but is the demon just changed position in the body and that was going to cause a worse problem later? That's right.
Speaker 2:So, adam, yes, you were doing witchcraft at school. What was the result? The consequences of it.
Speaker 4:It was like an invisibility spell that I had done and what it was is that I was calling demons to me and I would do it at school and I would do it at my house. I would do it at my house, I would do it in my room and I wanted just to not be seen because I wanted to do things, I wanted to steal, I wanted money and stuff really fast. So I'm like man, if I could walk into a bank and just take money and just walk out. It was very comical how I wanted to use it, but I still did it. The action still took place. That I did that, you know, and it was very, um, juvenile. What I wanted you know what I mean or how I wanted to get it, but, um, I would do it at school and I would do it at home. And you know it went. It got to the point where I was like this is real when, like, nobody would see me, like my parents didn't, like my mom didn't notice me, my dad didn't notice me, like.
Speaker 2:That's what it felt like. What was the consequence of it in your life?
Speaker 4:like family was love life that like like I said I couldn't, I couldn't have a relationship. I was always cheated on. I was always like talked about or it was like like I wasn't there. You know, like I would work so hard at one job and I'm like man, I'm doing all this stuff with my hands and then I'm like I'm feeling proud of it and it would just be dismissed, like nothing would happen. Like it was, there was nothing like, oh okay, like you did something, whatever you know, but it was something fundamental. You know, something that you know changed the direction at that job and it was just like the credit wasn't getting. It was like I was completely invisible.
Speaker 4:You know, I remember there was this one time where my mom and my brother and my sister they went on like a vacation, like a mini, like day vacation, and they left me at the house like with my dad, because my god, they forgot you yeah, you were invisible, that I didn't even get like invite.
Speaker 2:Nobody told me nothing so you know, spirit make you invisible.
Speaker 4:It works it works in a bad way yeah, they forgot you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so, ashley, uh, when you met him, was he doing this kind of things? How was him?
Speaker 5:He was very open to do different things. When we first met, I was working at a restaurant and he invited me to go to a concert, and that's how we met. We went to a concert and he was just drinking you know, inviting women out to dance and to drink, and you know, it was just um. He was just very, uh, open to meeting new women how did your suffering begin?
Speaker 5:um, at the beginning I just kind of put myself completely into the relationship. I was just 100 committed to him, just he was, you know, basically my god at the moment. He was my idol and I did everything to serve him and please him and you know, I just put in a lot of time and effort for for him and it felt like it went unnoticed. Um, all that time and effort felt like it went in vain because, but?
Speaker 2:he was saying before that all his relationship he was cheering on with you was different. You were taking care of him, doing your best for the relationship, but he was not, uh, faithful to you.
Speaker 5:No, he was not, no, um, he still would go out to the same bar, the same clubs, the same drinking, the smoking, the. You know, I never would check, because I never went through his phone, I never checked anything, because I just, you know, had faith that he would be the one to, you know, to marry.
Speaker 2:And yeah, it's just, it went downhill you wanted the relationship to work, but he was always in a different direction.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Okay, which one of these two you said that had parents that were divorced, that had religion.
Speaker 3:Well, actually your dad has been divorced three times, or he's on his third marriage.
Speaker 5:Yeah, my biological parents never married, never, no, they never married. They lived together. They had two children and then my dad wasn't faithful to my mom and he abandoned us and I'm still in contact with him. Uh, he was married, uh, to another woman and then I think they're divorced now and now he's in another relationship so that's why you found yourself in the same suffering relationship.
Speaker 2:Wise, yes, you did not want to be like your parents relationship wise.
Speaker 5:Yes, you did not want to be like your parents. No at all. I felt like I was following the same footsteps as my mom. You know being get having a child, being a single parent, having to provide for my own family, not having that support that so you became a single parent no, I didn't become a single parent um.
Speaker 2:We got married you got married, yeah, but the relationship was not good no, it wasn't in the beginning what was happening?
Speaker 5:um, well, it would just continue for him to just go to work and come home and just, you know, yell at me and and scream at me and, um, just completely ignore me and all the efforts. And still, you know, be on his phone and talk to women and just tell me they're friends and, you know, lie to me all the time, constantly.
Speaker 3:And then that caused what inside of you?
Speaker 5:Just a whole lot of insecurities. I felt like the scum of the earth. I felt like I was nothing. If I can't get his attention, if he can't love me, then who will? I felt like God even couldn't help me, because I would drink and sometimes I'd even smoke marijuana.
Speaker 2:And just to try to forget those feelings, just to try to ease that pain, you did not want to be like your mother, but you just became like that Drinking, smoking, drugs, yeah, okay. So, eden, you had now somebody that was not cheating on you. You had now a good wife. You were living with somebody, but now you were cheating on her.
Speaker 4:Yes, a lot of people say, like, oh well, you technically weren't cheating, you didn't have intercourse or you didn't have sexual relations with somebody. But cheating, it doesn't matter. If you cheat on a test for one answer, you didn't cheat the whole test, you cheated with one answer. You're still cheating. You know, I cheated on the phone, I cheated in my heart, I cheated in my mind, I cheated in every sense of the word. You know, like everybody's, like oh well, you didn't technically cheat. Like no, like I gave somebody else what I should have been giving to her. That's cheating.
Speaker 4:Instead of putting my answer on the test putting myself onto her. I failed at that, you know, and it was pretty bad. You know, I remember there was this one time where I came home and I was so mad at the people at work because they wouldn't work together with me and I was just so upset and I remember yelling at her one day and she just like cried because of how in her face I was just so upset and I remember yelling at her one day and she just like cried because of how in her face I was and I was just like, ok, well, that was like kind of like a wake up call hey, you need to treat her better, you need to do something different. You know, we stayed where we were living at for a little while, but that was kind of like a turning point where I was like man, like I'm never like that, you know.
Speaker 2:But I heard, like man, like I'm never like that, you know but I heard also, Aaron, that you were in the church before then you left. Yeah, Okay, you are watching us right now and you say I left the church. My life is from bad to worse. I used to be a Christian, a pastor, a deacon, you used to be a religious person, but now you have left and you have no strength to come back. Don't you wish but the offers, the reward, the things that you have around you. I'm talking about the drugs, the alcohol, nightclubs, the parties.
Speaker 2:It has been stronger than you, but you know that little by little, your soul is going to hell. You see hell dragging you to the pit. It is dragging you day by day. Remember the times that you feel like taking your life. The time is that you feel like this is the end. So this episode today is to repair your physical life, but also repair your spiritual life. Adam, praise God. I have never be far from God. I have never left the presence of God. He has been merciful to us. But I heard that when a person leaves, it's not that easy to come back. No, how many times you try to return?
Speaker 4:Um, when she was, she started going through my phone and it wasn't even like, oh, she did it, it was by accident, like she would see something or like, hey, what is that? And I would get caught, you know, and there was two times that I came to this church, you know, and I spoke to somebody here, you know, and so there's two times I came back, but before once I left the church the first time. I never came back.
Speaker 2:You had no strength to come back.
Speaker 4:No.
Speaker 2:Did you miss it?
Speaker 4:Part of me did you know and part of me wanted to come back too, so much so that I would still separate my tithe or something Like when we lived where we lived, I was like man, like I really want to change things or whatever, so I'm going to do what I know, or do what I knew. You know, and that was like you know what, like I remember them saying like god's gonna bless you if you do this, like I want that you know and I started doing. You can even ask her, like I drove all the way he said to put my title out there and drove back, you know you knew the words yeah you knew about the ties, you knew about the church, but you did not know god no, I was basically.
Speaker 4:I was kind of using him as like like an atm, like I put something in and I get something out.
Speaker 3:So how were those eight years that you had left God?
Speaker 4:It was miserable. It was miserable. I'm not saying that just because I'm here. I'm saying it really was miserable In here. I had never felt so alone, being surrounded by so many people.
Speaker 3:And anger too. Yeah, anger problem.
Speaker 4:I was so mad at everything, you know, and I would drown myself. You know, with shots I would drown myself all the time in Laker, like I don't know how much money that I've, you know, used in drinking. You know, it's unreal, like it's well over a couple thousand dollars of just drinking and drinking, and drinking, and drinking. I mean you can imagine for five years straight, dancing, going out five nights a week, how much the tab could be. You know, like every other day it's like fifty dollars, eighty dollars, sixty dollars, a hundred dollars, two hundred dollars.
Speaker 3:So you, you're trying to fight happiness. Dancing, drinking, having a good time, yeah, but were you still empty?
Speaker 4:yeah, and the reason why I went to like the dancing and stuff or whatever, is because, like, once I learned how to do it, I got good at it, you know, and I was like man, like these women are making me feel so much because people wanted to dance with me, and like I didn't have that attention because of the stuff I did. I was invisible to everybody. But now, invisible like oh, like you get excited with that, you get happy that, oh, I'm finally feeling something.
Speaker 3:So now what you wanted your whole life. You wanted people to pay attention.
Speaker 4:Yeah, but you were still empty. Yeah, it was like I had all this stuff, like women lining up to dance with me and stuff, and now I'm just like I, I go home and this is what happens when a person doesn't have the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 2:We see here the two sides of his story. First, he wants to be invisible. Now he became invisible before the women, yeah, and he was empty. So the human being is never happy, is never satisfied. That's why Jesus said without me, you can do nothing, you want to be invisible. Satan made him invisible, invisible, so now nobody was paying attention to him and he was empty. So who decided to go back to Jesus, to come?
Speaker 4:to church first to return?
Speaker 2:oh, when? Yeah, or what?
Speaker 4:happened who? Oh, I did, you did, I did. Okay, she gave me the ultimatum. One day she went through my phone and I was. I was addicted to pornography. I was paying women on, you know, social media sites and things on applications. I was paying women to send me nudes because I wanted attention. Yet she's giving me all the attention in the world, like you know. It was crazy, you know it's ludicrous Like who does that? You know somebody who's just not there in their mind and at that point she was depressed and even suicidal.
Speaker 4:She was depressed, suicidal, and she was pregnant. She was pregnant with our two-year-old son at that time and she finds out I'm paying all this money. We're lacking in bills. Remember we were struggling, struggling. And I had a good job. I had a good job, I was making a certain amount of money, we were doing well. But because of that addiction to the pornography, all this stuff, that's what happened.
Speaker 3:So, ashley, what was your ultimatum to him?
Speaker 5:I remember when I went through his phone, I found a whole bunch of stuff and my heart just shattered. I felt like what am I even doing here? And I was so angry, so shamed, just so, you know, just felt like the worst, the worst person in the world and I was so angry, I was throwing chairs, I was throwing chairs, I was hitting him. I even, you know, just wanted to leave. I just wanted to get out of there and I was pregnant and I didn't even have any means to get out of there. I just wanted to get out of there.
Speaker 4:It's like you were trapped, so what did you tell him?
Speaker 5:I told him that if I'm giving you one last chance, I'm not you know if I don't see you know that you changed this time for real then I'm actually leaving and I'm not letting you see your son ever.
Speaker 2:Because you have given him so many chances, so many chances. That one was the last one. That was the last one, adam. What did you do with that last chance? You came back to the church. What did you do in the church? What has God done for you?
Speaker 4:When I came back, I moved to a certain part of Houston. I was close to a newer job because we moved back to Houston and once I did that, I just started going to church. I found out that where I moved to was a church nearby. It was two lights down, so I started going there. And it's the same branch. It was just in a different location. So I started going there. I'm like, hey, this is what I need to do, I'm not going to waste it. God's like, hey, here's your chance, here's your moment to prove you're living here now. You're doing things basically like you're here now, and that's what I started doing. I started going to church. I made a pact last year. I'm like I'm going to church every sunday what has god done for you?
Speaker 2:how is the family now?
Speaker 4:it's happy, we're happy like we're married. You got married, we got married, we got married. I'm a married man. I'm a married man like I don't need a bunch of women for my satisfaction. I have the most beautiful woman right here with me, you know. And the the devil, he blinds you. You know, you feel like a lost cause. You feel like you're broken literally beyond repair, like there's nothing for you, that that that that can give you that sustainability, like you just feel so broken.
Speaker 2:But coming here like how long have you been married? For A month One month.
Speaker 4:Yeah, congratulations. Yeah, no, it was. It was a long time coming.
Speaker 2:Bring me the child here as well. So how old is the boy?
Speaker 4:He's two.
Speaker 2:Two years old, so before last month the wedding. How long were you together?
Speaker 4:Uh, this is the fourth year.
Speaker 2:The fourth year Living together, but no enteada.
Speaker 4:Yeah, no enteada for how long? No, enteada the same one at the time we got together really fast.
Speaker 2:Matt and Jess moved in Alright. So, ashley, now a new life. Now you are not a girlfriend, you are the wife.
Speaker 5:Yes, yeah, very proud to be a wife now. I never thought I'd be a wife.
Speaker 2:Amen. And who is this little boy? That's Jameson. Come here, come here, it's okay, come oh it's okay, come to your dad. Oh, come here, big guy, guy it's okay, baby, I think that somebody was sleeping.
Speaker 4:I think so too.
Speaker 5:Where's mommy Is your family? Oh, we're so happy, so blessed.
Speaker 2:You have now just had. What about the Holy Spirit?
Speaker 4:Last September I was baptized in the Holy Spirit. When I came to church I got laid off through the whole pandemic and things like that. So I was like, well, I have free time. So I started going to the church more. I started like you know what, babe, I'm going to go on Wednesday, I'm going to go on Friday, I'm going to start doing things. And I was like you know what? I'm going to get baptized in water, I'm going to commit my life to this. Like the opportunities that are presenting themselves are putting me on the right track. You know she has total faith in me. I'm as clear as water. Like you can tell whatever it's, there's no secrets anymore. You know there's nothing that's hiding behind the shadows or behind closed doors. Like no, all the doors are open. Like I feel free.
Speaker 4:You know, like I feel, like I like I'm a little heavy but I feel very light, you know, and it's been a long time coming and I should have done this earlier.
Speaker 2:Actually, he broke your trust so many times, but now Now I have total confidence in him.
Speaker 5:It's like I'm in a new relationship.
Speaker 2:New relationship yeah. New life. New family yeah, Totally transformed.
Speaker 4:It's possible. There's nothing that's impossible.
Speaker 2:What do you say for this person that backslided left Jesus left God. What do you say?
Speaker 4:If I'm going to tell you anything is man up, woman up, put your pride, pride aside and do it. Put your pride and just do it, because, like the prodigal son, you can leave, you can go, do whatever, but god really does have his arms open, you know, and I wouldn't have a family without it. I would be broken, a broken family. You know, the last thing I wanted to do was to be without my boy, was to be without a wife, without somebody. I wanted to be that, that one, to break the chain. And it hurts and it makes me emotional, because I'm like god really does forgive you. He really is there, you know, and it's it's, it's pure and it's sacred. But you, there's a chance. If you have that chance right now, take it. If you have that chance, go and take it. If there's a branch, if you have that chance right now, take it. If you have that chance, go and take it.
Speaker 4:If there's a branch near you, I'm not telling you as, oh, okay, I'm here with them, like no, I'm telling you personally if you have a chance, take that chance. Give God everything, pull your pride aside and do your best and give it to him. From me, adam, to you please. You can be happy. You can be happy, you can be free, you can break the chains. You have power, you have strength. He is the power, he is the strength and I promise you, if you do what's written in that book, it will happen. It will happen and you will be so happy. I'm a married man and I'm a dad. I'm a married man and I'm a dad. I'm a father and I'm telling you, if this is your, last chance.
Speaker 2:If you feel suicidal, go go to this place. So this is the word of someone that had an experience with god what are you waiting for? You are not broken beyond repent. The blind man said after he was healed. See what he said. He said one thing I know I was blind, but now I see. In other words, he said I was broken, but now I am repaired. God can repair your life, he can transform your life. Repaired, god can repair your life, he can transform your life. So the testimony, the family, shows it all you are not broken beyond repair.
Speaker 1:Broken beyond repair. The untold stories of those who were once broken. Thank you for listening to soul food Outro Music.